13 July

I had the opportunity to go for long walks along a seeming never-ending beach. Just let go and reflect. I had much to think about. It feels like the last time I had a birthday like this one, was at the time of my birth. Here I stand once again, naked, striped of all I have been and all that I have done. Only this time, I am conscious, looking at the blank pages of the future.

(Thinking of You - Kenny Pimmer)

One thing one can know for sure about life, is that when you least expect it, a curved ball will come and give you a wake-up call. “So you thought you knew where you are going, think again.” In retrospective wisdom, of course I realise why I needed the wake-up call. No rest for the wicket. It was after all me out of my own free will who vowed to reach my full potential and what did I think? Did I really think it was going to be an easy road?

No but I was hoping for some respite in between at least, not “for how long can you tread water?” Ah well once you are on the roller coaster ride, you can't get off until the ride is done, might as well enjoy the ride.

“I must go down! I must go down deeper than ever I descended – deeper into pain than ever I descended ... Thus my destiny wants it. Well, I am ready.” - Friedrich Nietzsche

On the journey to the core of yourself, there always seems to be another layer to uncover. Often I wonder to myself, “What more can there possibly be?” It is like the roots of some weeds, even if you leave just a tiny bit, that bit will grow back into a full plant, if you do not diligently and with vigilance keep on digging to the very bottom of it. The cleaner the mirror of the self becomes the quicker dirt will show up.

In things of the spirit one is always at the beginning.

“Better keep yourself clean and bright; you are the window through
which you must see the world.”
-- George Bernard Shaw

tags: mirror  core  directions  spirit  birthday